Battle: Los Angeles

What if I told you that you could go out right now and see a sci-fi action movie without any big preachy message, bumbling kid-hero, wisecracking sidekicks, or time wasted on developing unlikable characters? If that proposition sounds too tempting to refuse you'll be as surprised as I was when the final product is essentially Starship Troopers without the clever irony or camp value.  For a movie that's 80% action and avoids the above-mentioned pitfalls, Battle: Los Angeles really has no excuse for not being more compelling.

Battle: Los Angeles tells you everything you need to know right in the title. There's a battle in Los Angeles. Who's fighting or why doesn't matter, since neither the humans or aliens are given any personality. Like I've said about countless movies before, the generic setup is forgivable as long as it sets up some first-rate action. Sadly, this movie's biggest shortcoming is that it only partially delivers in the one place it should.

Take a moment and think about any classic battle scene. Can you visualize the battlefield? Can you get a good sense of the size and scope of the conflict? And when both sides clash, can you understand the geometry? Do you see both sides' tactics at work or at least figure out where everyone's going and why? What happens when you break these rules is a confused mess that just doesn't feel like a battle. Think of the first battle scene in Alexander for reference on how this can go wrong. Battle: Los Angeles is exactly like that. Shooting happens then more shooting happens. Characters die and you forget about them in seconds. There's never any sense that ground is gained or a big objective is any closer to completion. There are definitely cool moments, but a movie that's mostly combat simply shouldn't feel so slow.

To its credit, Battle: Los Angeles is appropriately gritty and realistic. The action is brutal without ever going overboard, and the idea of seeing everything through a soldier's perspective and knowing no more than they do is interesting. The alien technology looks fascinating and surprisingly real, even if the aliens themselves look somewhat goofy. But that doesn't change the fact that for most of the movie's runtime nothing exciting happens. Like the characters, most of the dialogue is disposable. Soldiers spout the same lines you've heard in countless other war movies, and the comparison only serves to remind you how good this movie could have been with a tighter script and a better eye for action.

In short, Battle: Los Angeles is like the sweater you get for Christmas when you were hoping for an X-Box. It delivers what they think you should want instead of what you actually wanted. It's not smart enough to be taken seriously, but too serious to have much fun with its premise. If there's anything I can say in this movie's defense, it's that I've seen this formula fail far worse before.

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